hypertext shouting.
Woot haikux0rz. Thank you. I don't like the first one. A haiku is too short to carry a metaphor or any traditional western symbolism. Second one is good. Refine the second line, i don't think the first word is necessary. Otherwise I think it's pretty decent.
Sweet! "A car passes by me" is a little strange though, it just somehow doesn't flow.Cheers,bern
The theme was the transience of life; you can read each haiku individually, or take the three together. Even the shape of the poem is supposed to convey that XD
Woot haikux0rz. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI don't like the first one. A haiku is too short to carry a metaphor or any traditional western symbolism.
Second one is good. Refine the second line, i don't think the first word is necessary. Otherwise I think it's pretty decent.
Sweet! "A car passes by me" is a little strange though, it just somehow doesn't flow.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
bern
The theme was the transience of life; you can read each haiku individually, or take the three together. Even the shape of the poem is supposed to convey that XD
ReplyDelete