"Why is the sky blue?"
A little girl once asked me.
Well, I didn't know the answer,
And I told her thus.
She held it for a moment, her little head in thought.
"But you must!", came her reply.
"You're a grownup. You know everything."
And I chuckled.
How could I bear to tell her
That I do not know what I know?
And so today a little girl
Still thinks it's painted blue.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
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4 comments:
you mean... it isn't? *wide-eyed disbelief*
Is the rhyme intentional? Doesn't really fit in at all if it is... if it isn't, I think using the word 'thus' is out of place.
I really like the concept and I think you've somewhat managed to capture the innocence of the girl. Although I think perhaps the last stanza could do with a little touch-up. Cute piece though!
lol rayner. the problem here is, that
if you arranged it into prose, it wouldn't be any different. The line breaks make no difference, and the language isn't sufficiently condensed. Could use revision.
It's all about the line breaks, Adam. Poetry is as much visual/presentation as anything else. I believe even font does contribute to the effect.
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